But anyway...

All that aside, there are currently two great stories in the comments to my earlier post, "Nothing more than an inconsequential red herring," Mrs. Porter snipped. "Besides, if it weren't for that, we'd have all drowned." Though I like how neither really answers quite why Mrs. Porter was saying that. I'm glad the theme seems to involve cryptic ramblings. Check them out!

This Started as a Brief Update

THIS pissed me off--

PETA, whom I typically regard as a band of attention-seeking monsters who speed along the process of fur manufacturing by destroying what's already manufactured, further solidified my disdain by announcing that they are also apparently against the existence, breeding, and rescuing of Pit Bulls, so says this article

I love that "an unpredictable chihuahua is one thing, an unpredictable pit another." Put a Chihuahua next to a Pit and which one seems more dangerous? Brilliant comparison, Ingrid Newkirk. How about an unpredictable Doberman or Mastiff? Hey, a mouse with pointy teeth is one thing, but a Siberian Tiger with pointy teeth is another!

Look, the continuing negative portrayal of Pits by the media is exactly what encourages assholes looking for a deadly dog to breed them. If you convinced dog fighters that Rotweillers were vicious killing machines, then those idiots would breed Rots, and we'd see them mauling police and killing babies. It's not in the blood. It's in the upbringing. Great Danes were bred for protection too. You can't tie any old Husky to the front of a sled and expect to win the Iditarod. Does your Chihuahua quiero Taco Bell? Well probably, but just because it's food, not because its Mexican.

She says "those who argue against...the shelter euthenasia policy for pit bulls are naive." Said policy is, in her own words, "any pit bull that comes through the front door doesn't go out the back door alive." ANY! Any pit bull. Naive? Any and all pit bulls brought into an ANIMAL SHELTER should be executed without regards to their behavior or upbringing. Well the definition I have of naive is showing lack of experience, wisdom, or judgement, Ingrid. I just wish I could meet her in person so my pit bull could rip her face off, except my Pit wouldn't attack Hitler if she had the chance, but she'd still be immediately euthanized upon entering a god damn ANIMAL SHELTER according to that attention grubbing hack.

Couldn't you use all your damn power and publicity to educate people about these dogs rather than try to appease the masses by going along with ignorant stereotypes and inconclusive data? Sure, look how many fatal dog attacks have been by Pits in the last 20 years (20% of them, by the way), and look at how the aggression towards these dogs grows. It's a downward spiral people. Quit contributing. Yes, I am for cracking down on breeding, because they are largely bred for fighting purposes. But can we PLEASE start focusing on the PEOPLE who are doing this? PETA? Hello? Isn't that what you're supposed to DO? Get PEOPLE who are UNETHICALLY treating ANIMALS? Like YOU?!  For like 2 months after Michael Vick was arrested, there were a smattering of stories about people running dog fighting rings. And then everyone forgot. Let's go back to blaming it on the dogs. It's easier to euthanize the strays than to find the people responsible for abandoning them or torturing them into being frightened, vicious attackers.

Now, I'd also like to point out that I mentioned 20% of all FATAL dog attacks are Pit Bulls. This comes from a study by the Centers for Disease Control, which, by the way, does NOT advocate breed-specific legislation, which you can find in their write-up, here. Thank you, doctors and scientists for providing an educated take on the matter. One other thing they do point out is that their is NO system currently enacted to record NON-fatal dog attacks. Here's the thing... When it comes down to it, there's probably WAY less NON-fatal Pit Bull attacks than fatal. They are ridiculously strong and determined dogs. What this study is admittedly not telling us is how often any given breed actually attacks. Which means the study tells us nothing except that they are more deadly in an attacking situation. Any implication from this study that Pit Bulls actually attack more than other breeds is completely fabricated and has no backing. Jesus, I didn't even take statistics and I can tell you that.

Every so often the debate switches to gun control. If I'm for keeping Pits legal, why don't I say the same thing about guns? It's not the gun's fault, it's the owner! Just like Pits, right? Well, how about this-- Pit Bulls are living intelligent creatures and we have no right to kill them just because we don't know how else to cope with the problem!! Guns are man-made killing machines. Just wanted to make that clear before it comes up.

I'm not saying there aren't surprise attacks by Pits. I'm not saying I'd leave one alone with children and feel safe. These dogs pack a tremendous amount of power and should be monitored carefully. My dog doesn't know how strong she is, she could easily crush a Pomeranian (which does also live at our house) with her bare feet. But I'm a responsible owner who doesn't leave her alone with a Pom. I don't fall asleep in a drug coma while my baby is on the floor and my Pit hasn't been fed all day. But beyond not being an absolute idiot, it doesn't take a lot to own a Pit responsibly. Just pay attention to her. Problem is, most people don't pay enough attention to their damn BEAGLES.

I'm also not saying that PETA has never done anything good for the animals. Of course they've made tremendous strides, and most of the members, donors, and activists are doing what they do in support of the animals. But I'll write more about Ingrid Newkirk later and why she is a CRAZY PERSON. And I know PETA doesn't outwardly condone the militant paint-throwers, but it's typically found to be PETA members doing it, and they are some of the least efficient and most obnoxious protesters I know of in history. Pissing people off is no way to make a name for yourself or your cause. 

Anyway, I keep going back and adding things, so I'll wrap this up. Now, this article is from 2005. If there's any evidence that the "People" for the "Ethical" Treatment of Animals have acted to the contrary in the last four years, I'd love to hear it. Until then, if you see Ingrid Newkirk, feel free to pour a bucket of paint on her and see if she doesn't go back to the store and buy more of the clothes you destroyed.


"Nothing more than an inconsequential red herring," Mrs. Porter snipped. "And besides, if it weren't for that, we'd all have drowned."

If you checked out CNN today, you might have seen that one trillion seconds is about 32,000 years! They were talking about the trillions of dollars everyone owes and needs right now. If I'd saved 1 dollar every second of my life for 24 years, I'd have 756,864,000 dollars. I'd have to make it 1,321 dollars a second to have reached one trillion by now.

I found an estimate that 106,456,367,669 people have ever been born (one-hundred six billion). As of February 2009, there are 6,757,540,531 (6.7 billion) people in the world which means that roughly 5% of the people who were ever born are alive today. Which, for the entire history of mankind, is a ridiculously high number. Stop having babies, please. It's actually very easy. Here, I'll show you:

See? And yeah, that's the California state seal in the background. I imagine they'd be the first state to figure this out. Now, Will's pushing it cause he's got three kids. In case you didn't know, "Willard Christopher "Trey" Smith III: Born in 1992. His mother is Sheree Zampino."

But enough about the Pinkett-Smiths. Let's talk about you. Write me a short story using the quote line from the title of this blog. The best one wins me saying so. Leave it as a comment or post it elsewhere and leave me a link to it. Ready? GO!